What do you think?

[hectari]

No, he wasn't drunk.

For years he told me I was the one with the problem..that I needed to get help. So I did. I got counseling...it helped me to see that he has anger problem...helped me see that he's the one with the problem....

and yes, you only hear my side...but knowing me as you do on these boards....you've heard me admit when I screw up..make a mistake, misunderstand something and "stand corrected". I'm willing to compromise, he hasn't been....and he hit me.....says I wouldn't leave him alone...we'd only been fighting for less than 10 ****ing minutes.

When did he become like this was he like these even before the kids? that is the scariest when someone changes out of the blue after knowing them so long! I relate with you alot! my situation was similar the girl had a powertrip on me and took advantage of me and said if I trully loved her I would have forgived her....Remember your kids are older and I think things would be easier if you took time from the guy then when they were smaller, hope they understand. Do they know he is physically abusive?

[nance]

When did he become like this was he like these even before the kids? that is the scariest when someone changes out of the blue after knowing them so long! I relate with you alot! my situation was similar the girl had a powertrip on me and took advantage of me and said if I trully loved her I would have forgived her....Remember your kids are older and I think things would be easier if you took time from the guy then when they were smaller, hope they understand. Do they know he is physically abusive?

Yes, they know he is. My son's response was "That *******. And he tells me not to hit girls" when I told him about the arrest.

The abuse has been going on for years....sad to say, I thought I could fix it....how wrong I was. IT would only be when we fought and only a few times a year....so I thought it was ok. It's taken me years and counseling to realize that I can't fix someone else's problem. We even went 3 years without any violence...so I thought things were good again. Then something happened here at home with our son and he "escaped" into whatever interested him and that took him away from us. He essentially abandoned us emotionally. I can see this clearly now...it explains a lot of what I've been feeling in the last 1-1/2 years. He got worse over the last few months....

I grew up with abuse and it was always my fault. My brother hit me and beat me up because I pissed him off. My dad, same thing...it was always my fault, so when it started with my husband....I always "knew" it was my fault. I knew it was wrong, but didn't know how to fix it. Funny, he's the one who told me how....

You know, he once broke his hand hitting me on top of my head....and I remember the look on his face when I asked if he was okay. It was the look of "this is all your fault"...and I accepted the blame....

[nance]

Hang in there.

I tied a knot and I'm hanging on...thanks.

[Shaolin Bushido]

"You know, he once broke his hand hitting me on top of my head....and I remember the look on his face when I asked if he was okay. It was the look of "this is all your fault"...and I accepted the blame...."




Now THAT'S LOVE! And I ain't never been in it.

[SonnyG8R]

I hate fighting with my wife. Lately we've had some arguments over inlaws. Hers and mine are both nuts but we get defensive when "our" parents are put down. Anyway her rents are coming for 10 days and I'm completely dreading it. I think that must be what hell is like. An eternity with inlaws. lol.

Anyway, I've never laid a hand on her but I've called her some nasty names.

Then 5 minutes later I'm ready for make up ***.

[nance]

I hate fighting with my wife. Lately we've had some arguments over inlaws. Hers and mine are both nuts but we get defensive when "our" parents are put down. Anyway her rents are coming for 10 days and I'm completely dreading it. I think that must be what hell is like. An eternity with inlaws. lol.

Anyway, I've never laid a hand on her but I've called her some nasty names.

Then 5 minutes later I'm ready for make up ***.

You're always ready for any kind of ***.

[SonnyG8R]

You're always ready for any kind of ***.

Well, not any kind But I don't stay mad long. I usually get mad and erupt with a few choice words and then quickly put the argument behind me. It's a lot better than walking around with pent up anger all the time.

Oh yeah, and don't roll your eyes at me.

[hectari]

Yes, they know he is. My son's response was "That *******. And he tells me not to hit girls" when I told him about the arrest.

The abuse has been going on for years....sad to say, I thought I could fix it....how wrong I was. IT would only be when we fought and only a few times a year....so I thought it was ok. It's taken me years and counseling to realize that I can't fix someone else's problem. We even went 3 years without any violence...so I thought things were good again. Then something happened here at home with our son and he "escaped" into whatever interested him and that took him away from us. He essentially abandoned us emotionally. I can see this clearly now...it explains a lot of what I've been feeling in the last 1-1/2 years. He got worse over the last few months....

I grew up with abuse and it was always my fault. My brother hit me and beat me up because I pissed him off. My dad, same thing...it was always my fault, so when it started with my husband....I always "knew" it was my fault. I knew it was wrong, but didn't know how to fix it. Funny, he's the one who told me how....

You know, he once broke his hand hitting me on top of my head....and I remember the look on his face when I asked if he was okay. It was the look of "this is all your fault"...and I accepted the blame....

Oh geez! I really feel for you....This is a circle and it is sad...I am glad you are still sane though and unbiased....I knew a girl who her dad used to yell at her mom and beat her up and blame her because he drank....but this girl is not as strong as you because she became a man hater and biased, when that girl cheated on me she never felt bad and she was my supposed best friend she would say maybe you overthink things...it was strange how she would talk to me and one day i talked to her about my problem with the girl and then she started crying and said I was like her father and that really tripped me out!! I have to commend you madcrewmom for staying in their and not hating all men, thanks again for the advice. you trully are the definition of tough!

oh ya and my supposed good friend is 30 and she has never had a boyfriend, and she still talks to those people who done me wrong, I talk to her on occasion but she says mean things like get over it and grow up! When I told her I cant go around their anymore.....what do you think I shyould do I have the feeling to leave her alone and stop talking to her, because she always rubs in how she is still good friends with my enemies. You think she is taking out her vengance on me? I feel so.

[jack_the_rippuh]

Me and my chick never fight, we just argue and say hateful things to each other..

[puppy_dogg]

tito is a *****....