I just bought a new book "The Boxer Verb Dictionary". It's a great book, just $2.95 in the shops, and it explains how boxers' names have come to be used as verbs in recent years.
Here's a few examples:
To Wlad - To do something methodically and without interest. Has John got those Excel spreadsheet figures yet? Yes, he's Wladding those stats, they'll be here in a predictable and clinical timescale.
Wladded - To rush into a situation carelessly and without due caution, such as getting KO'd easily by an obese South African golfer. Doug drove his car at 100mph thinking he'd made the turning, but he really Wladded it.
Dirrelling - To run or engage in activities in an unco-ordinated, less than manly fashion, possibly even falling over. I can't believe we picked Ben for our soccer team, every time he runs to take a shot at goal he Dirrells it.
Guzmanned - To start out with high expecations but then just completely fall off the radar. Hey, remember when Chris was head of the class, top football player and classmate most voted to get somewhere in life? Well I haven't heard from him in all the years since school broke up... his life really Guzmanned.
Judahed - To underachieve spectacularly, and then end up as a punching bag for anyone to take a swing at. Hey, remember Bruce? We all thought he'd be a brain surgeon or a NASA scientist? Well I heard he ended up working as a toilet attendant in a crack house... he really Judahed his life. What's worse is, he got ***** slapped last week by a hobo from Puerto Rico.
To Kessle. To have a total lack of mental faith; to fold mentally. Bob shot fifteen hoops in a row at last week's basketball game, but as soon as he missed one he just Kessled completely.
Hattoned - To rush into a situation in a foolhardy manner and come unstuck. Similar to being Wladded, only it's a situation you can't get over for fifteen hours. He got Hattoned last week and still needs to lie down over it.
Hopkinated - To take something potentially interesting and make it tedious. I was really looking forward to my hot date with Kate, but when I got her into bed she just kept on putting me in an arm lock and putting her forehead into my eye... she really Hopkinated that ***.
Pavliked - The art of having your potential ludicruously over-inflated by others who aren't thinking it through. Hey, you know Brian, the disabled guy with no legs? I feel sure he's gonna become an Olympic gold medallist for the 100m sprint.
Johnsoning - To moan so vociferously about something being taken from you that by the time you've finished bitching people have forgotten what it was in the first place, and whether they should care. Who took my can of Miller Lite out of the fridge? That was my can. Why do you keep doing this to me? Every thing that's mine, they take. Why? Why they do this to me?
Scullying - The art of hanging onto the nuts of a mediocre talent and proclaiming it to be more, often in the total absence of personal dignity. Wow, you know how the new U2 album was kind of average at best and not up to their usual standard? Well Brad's walking around campus saying it's his favourite album of all time and offering to blow Bono for it. He's really Scullying that album.
Mayweathering - To repeatedly do tasks that are way beneath your abilities and then boast about doing them. Wow, Tommy goes around saying he's the best Xerox operator in the office, but he only photocopies two sheets of paper a day and then tells everyone he's done a thousand.
Witterage - To make a feeble excuse for something that's unlikely to be believed. Hi, Ben? It's me, Peter. I'm afraid I won't be able to make it into work today, ummmm... my elbow's hurting a little bit. No, honestly.
See also: De La Hoyying.
Toneying - To let yourself down at the worst possible moment of opportunity. I gave Jack a job as my new **** star, he had a really good six pack and could **** the ladies all night. But when he turned up to the job he had massive ****, stank of B.O. and kept missing so badly he couldn't even get his **** in a vag. Not only that, but we had to wipe the **** shoot from memory as he failed a test afterwards, he really Toneyed the whole thing.
Mundined - To have an extreme adverse effect to minimal adversity. I can't believe it, Tony had a fly bump into his temple and knock him unconscious for fifteen days... that fly really Mundined him.
Katsidding - The art of looking talented at something at a lower level, but failing spectacularly when the level is increased. Wow, Roger really suprised me... when I asked him to draw stick figures he looked like Rembrandt. But then when I asked him to paint a watercolour he couldn't even hold the brush and fell on the floor repeatedly. He really Kastidded that painting.
Here's a few examples:
To Wlad - To do something methodically and without interest. Has John got those Excel spreadsheet figures yet? Yes, he's Wladding those stats, they'll be here in a predictable and clinical timescale.
Wladded - To rush into a situation carelessly and without due caution, such as getting KO'd easily by an obese South African golfer. Doug drove his car at 100mph thinking he'd made the turning, but he really Wladded it.
Dirrelling - To run or engage in activities in an unco-ordinated, less than manly fashion, possibly even falling over. I can't believe we picked Ben for our soccer team, every time he runs to take a shot at goal he Dirrells it.
Guzmanned - To start out with high expecations but then just completely fall off the radar. Hey, remember when Chris was head of the class, top football player and classmate most voted to get somewhere in life? Well I haven't heard from him in all the years since school broke up... his life really Guzmanned.
Judahed - To underachieve spectacularly, and then end up as a punching bag for anyone to take a swing at. Hey, remember Bruce? We all thought he'd be a brain surgeon or a NASA scientist? Well I heard he ended up working as a toilet attendant in a crack house... he really Judahed his life. What's worse is, he got ***** slapped last week by a hobo from Puerto Rico.
To Kessle. To have a total lack of mental faith; to fold mentally. Bob shot fifteen hoops in a row at last week's basketball game, but as soon as he missed one he just Kessled completely.
Hattoned - To rush into a situation in a foolhardy manner and come unstuck. Similar to being Wladded, only it's a situation you can't get over for fifteen hours. He got Hattoned last week and still needs to lie down over it.
Hopkinated - To take something potentially interesting and make it tedious. I was really looking forward to my hot date with Kate, but when I got her into bed she just kept on putting me in an arm lock and putting her forehead into my eye... she really Hopkinated that ***.
Pavliked - The art of having your potential ludicruously over-inflated by others who aren't thinking it through. Hey, you know Brian, the disabled guy with no legs? I feel sure he's gonna become an Olympic gold medallist for the 100m sprint.
Johnsoning - To moan so vociferously about something being taken from you that by the time you've finished bitching people have forgotten what it was in the first place, and whether they should care. Who took my can of Miller Lite out of the fridge? That was my can. Why do you keep doing this to me? Every thing that's mine, they take. Why? Why they do this to me?
Scullying - The art of hanging onto the nuts of a mediocre talent and proclaiming it to be more, often in the total absence of personal dignity. Wow, you know how the new U2 album was kind of average at best and not up to their usual standard? Well Brad's walking around campus saying it's his favourite album of all time and offering to blow Bono for it. He's really Scullying that album.
Mayweathering - To repeatedly do tasks that are way beneath your abilities and then boast about doing them. Wow, Tommy goes around saying he's the best Xerox operator in the office, but he only photocopies two sheets of paper a day and then tells everyone he's done a thousand.
Witterage - To make a feeble excuse for something that's unlikely to be believed. Hi, Ben? It's me, Peter. I'm afraid I won't be able to make it into work today, ummmm... my elbow's hurting a little bit. No, honestly.
See also: De La Hoyying.
Toneying - To let yourself down at the worst possible moment of opportunity. I gave Jack a job as my new **** star, he had a really good six pack and could **** the ladies all night. But when he turned up to the job he had massive ****, stank of B.O. and kept missing so badly he couldn't even get his **** in a vag. Not only that, but we had to wipe the **** shoot from memory as he failed a test afterwards, he really Toneyed the whole thing.
Mundined - To have an extreme adverse effect to minimal adversity. I can't believe it, Tony had a fly bump into his temple and knock him unconscious for fifteen days... that fly really Mundined him.
Katsidding - The art of looking talented at something at a lower level, but failing spectacularly when the level is increased. Wow, Roger really suprised me... when I asked him to draw stick figures he looked like Rembrandt. But then when I asked him to paint a watercolour he couldn't even hold the brush and fell on the floor repeatedly. He really Kastidded that painting.
NSB needs more Annie threads.
Very good.
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