I don’t eat hot dogs or hamburgers anymore. I’ve never enjoyed parades. As a dog owner, I have an overwhelming hatred for fireworks. This whole 4th of July holiday we’re celebrating all weekend long — it ain’t for me.

But I do consider myself a patriot. I love my country. (Or at least, I love the ideal of what my country could be.) Some people show their love by eating grilled meats and delighting in loud noises. I prefer an alternate path to displaying patriotism.

In 2024, when bravely we hope against all hope, and there is so much at stake, and it seems our freedom’s up against the ropes … I believe the most patriotic thing you can do this holiday weekend is watch Rocky IV.

We’re talking about a movie that ended the Cold War. Yeah, yeah, Ronald Reagan met with Mikhail Gorbachev for the Geneva Summit on November 19, 1985, which predated the release of Rocky IV by two days. But at no point during that summit did Gorby stand up and clap for an American. You wanna say there were other assorted factors besides Rocky Balboa upsetting Ivan Drago that played some small role in bringing about the collapse of the Soviet Union? Fine. But “The Italian Stallion” gets the bulk of the credit.

So to celebrate Independence Day in America this long weekend — and, appropriately, about a week out from Jaron “Boots” Ennis’ return to the ring in South Philly — I’ve done my patriotic duty and rewatched Rocky IV. Here’s my time-coded running diary. (If you’d like to watch along, the movie is streaming on Amazon Prime Video, which surely you subscribe to if you’re a boxing fan, because Prime Video is now a boxing streaming network. Allegedly.)

0:30: Survivor’s “Eye of the Tiger” starts, a stars-and-stripes boxing glove and a hammer-and-sickle boxing glove collide in a display of special effects that were presumably state of the art in 1985, and we’re into the replay of the end of Rocky III.

OK, let’s get this out of the way. My most controversial Rocky-related take, the one that really pisses some people off, especially people who were young and impressionable in 1982: Rocky III is not a good movie, and Rocky IV is the marginally superior cartoonish Rocky sequel. Look, I grew up thinking Rocky III was good too, but then several years ago I did a full series binge with my son and was alarmed to discover that Rocky III is trash. Sylvester Stallone had to have been on acid when he wrote the Thunderlips scene. Stallone and Talia Shire are responsible for maybe the most poorly acted scene in cinematic history. (You know the one.) The fight scenes aren’t even any good.

It hurts to hear it, I’m sure, but a lot of beloved movies from the ‘70s and ‘80s are varying degrees of lousy if you’re able to view them through non-nostalgic eyes. Not that these movies don’t have occasional funny moments or iconic scenes, but Caddyshack, Fletch, Fast Times at Ridgemont High, The Bad News Bears, and Top Gun are all significantly worse than you remember them being. Some are loaded with plot holes; others can’t have plot holes because they don’t have plots.

And with that, I promise I’m (mostly) finished taking a dump on your childhood. Let’s get back to Rocky IV, which is itself not a great movie, but at least it’s better than its overrated predecessor.

2:00: The Rocky III replay ends with the iconic Rocky-Apollo sparring session. Ding. Ding. Apollo Creed and Carl Weathers (RIP) may be the all-time most “nobody else could have played that role” marriage of actor and character there’s ever been. Rocky and Apollo both let power punches go at the same time, we go to freeze-frame before we see what lands, and the words “Written & Directed by Sylvester Stallone” appear on the screen. God help us.

5:10: Paulie’s birthday robot enters. Rocky IV didn’t just end the Cold War. It also predicted AI. The “walking trash can,” as Paulie calls it, speaks, and we are reminded that this was very much the age of Knight Rider. By the way, Burt Young was himself a boxer in his younger () days. I had no idea until word got around after he died at age 83 last October.

6:30: It’s Rocky-Adrian sexy time. Stallone is wearing something in between a boxer’s robe and a bullfighter’s outfit. Thankfully, the freeze frame/cut technique is employed before things get too steamy.

8:05: We get our first look at Drago. We learn his wife, played by Brigitte Nielsen, was an Olympic swimming champion out of Russia. There’s a whole alternate history where Mrs. Drago challenges Nancy Hogshead to a 100-meter freestyle race and that ends the Cold War instead.

11:40: Our first mention of blood doping and steroids. Brigitte distracts with a Popeye/spinach joke — but only because it wouldn’t have been believable for a Russian in 1985 to claim “contaminated Mexican meat.”

12:40: Apollo, over at Rocky’s house to share his plan to take on Drago, is appropriately weirded out by Paulie’s robot, which is now speaking in a sexy voice. Apollo, retired almost five years, misses the spotlight and wants an exhibition. Maybe Creed vs. Drago is a bad idea, but I’d take it over Floyd Mayweather vs. John Gotti III. As Rocky and Apollo discuss the latter’s return to the ring, I’m finding moments of the dialogue to be a profound peek inside the mind of a retired former champion, and other moments to be written about as well as a typical episode of Beverly Hills 90210.

17:35: The Ring put a preview of an exhibition fight on the cover of the magazine? Questionable editorial judgment there. Never would have happened in the Nigel Collins/Eric Raskin/Joe Santoliquito era.

19:10: At the press conference, Drago’s manager/promoter, who the internet tells me is named Nicolai Koloff because I guess Sly watched a lot of pro wrestling in the ‘80s, tells Apollo, “You can box, yes, but you are far too old to think that you can win over Drago.” For what it’s worth, Mike Tyson, who is scheduled to fight in November, is about 20 years older than Apollo is supposed to be in Rocky IV.

20:15: Drago vs. Creed is at the MGM Grand in Las Vegas, but it isn’t the MGM Grand we think of that has hosted many of the most historic fights of the last 30 years. This is a different building, which became Bally’s Las Vegas in ’86 and Horseshoe Las Vegas in 2022.

23:15: “Living in America” starts, with James Brown performing live and Apollo, in USA shorts, vest, top hat, and gloves, dancing along. Did Creed sap his own strength with all the dancing? Would have been a good question to ask him at the postfight presser. Ya know, had he (spoiler) survived the fight. By the way, the “Living in America” entrance takes up nearly three minutes of movie time — which makes it the third-longest uninterrupted musical sequence of Rocky IV.

26:20: Two boxing-biz notables appear: Leroy Neiman is the ring announcer, and Lou Filippo is the ref. The commentators are not boxing guys — Stu Nahan and Warner Wolf.

29:10: Round 1 of Drago-Creed begins and, frankly, Drago’s technique is lousy. He’s holding his left hand low, and his footwork is utterly graceless. Having recently rewatched Lennox Lewis vs. Vitali Klitschko, I have to say, Drago reminds me a lot of Vitali.

30:40: Drago lands five clean punches after the bell (in an exhibition!), Creed is bloodied and out on his feet, and there is no realistic world in which this isn’t stopped here. Actually, Drago likely gets DQ’d on the spot. It’s still not as disconnected from reality as Rocky vs. Thunderlips, and for plot purposes I understand why the fight goes on, but … it’s a reach.

32:15: Apollo’s soon-to-be widow yells “Stop the fight,” ref Filippo steps in to stop it but Drago shoves him off, the Russian keeps landing, Duke says “throw the towel,” Rocky picks it up but hesitates, Duke insists “throw the damn towel!” and a final super-slo-mo left hand causes Creed to collapse as Mrs. Drago smiles. You know that guilty conscience Rocky had afterward, for not throwing in the towel? It’s warranted. Apollo’s death is absolutely on him.

33:35: “If he dies, he dies.” The most iconic line of the movie? It’s either this or the “if I can change” bit.

35:25: Apollo dying makes the cover of Rolling Stone. I like to believe the article was written by a then-twenty-something William Miller.

36:10: Rocky reveals he’s fighting Drago for no money, in Russia, on Christmas. Is Rocky IV a Christmas movie? Discuss amongst yourselves.

38:35: Rocky comes home, and Adrian, who learned from the press that her hubby is going to fight Drago, is not happy. She makes some good arguments for why he shouldn’t do it, but Rocky answers that he’s facing Drago “because I’m a fighter. That’s the way I’m made, Adrian. That’s what you married. We can’t change what we are.” She insists, “It’s suicide!” and “You can’t win!” And Rocky replies, “Maybe I can’t win. But maybe the only thing I can do is just take everything he’s got. But to beat me, he’s going to have to kill me. And to kill me, he’s going to have to have the heart to stand in front of me. And to do that, he’s gotta be willing to die himself. And I don’t know if he’s ready to do that.” Credit where it’s due, this actually decent writing. It’s exceptional writing by Rocky sequel standards. But it’s also pretty solid by normal standards.

41:25: The first musical montage begins, set to Robert Tepper’s “There’s No Easy Way Out.” It’s more than four minutes of Stallone driving, and basically remembering every single moment from the first 3½ movies, including his fight with Spider Rico for some reason. We get a closeup of Rocky’s Pennsylvania license plate, which bore the slogan “You’ve Got a Friend in Pennsylvania.” Growing up in the Philly suburbs in the ‘80s, I distinctly remember one of my school teachers objecting to the grammar. Rightly so. Good lesson for all you fight scribes out there: Don’t write “you’ve got” when “you have” is available to you.

48:30: “Burning Heart” starts. Another take that may piss some people off: This is a better song than “Eye of the Tiger” (if, undeniably, less iconic). Is it East vs. West, or man against man? Great question.

52:30: A nice moment of comic relief from Paulie, who, upon seeing their training cabin in Russia, remarks, “What a depressing vacation,” then tumbles in the snow.

55:05: It’s time for another montage, the first training montage of Rocky IV (unless you count the training montage clips within the “There’s No Easy Way Out” memory montage). We’re dealt an effective compare/contrast between Rocky’s primitive training methods and Drago training in a lab.

58:45: Rocky has a beard, and Adrian has come to Russia. She missed him. Aw. The acting in this scene is lousy, but Stallone and Shire have done worse. (Again, you know what scene I’m talking about.)

1:00:00: After a 75-second break, we’re right back into another training montage! This one is set to “Hearts on Fire.” Categorize Rocky IV as a movie if you want, but it’s probably more accurate to think of it as an extended ’80 music video. In this montage, we see Drago juicing. He’s definitely Jarrell Miller’s favorite fictional fighter. At the end of a four-minute montage, Rocky ditches his security detail, climbs a mountain, and yells “Drago!” multiple times. It’s cheesy but it works — how can you not be pumped for the fight?

1:04:15: Barry Tompkins! 

1:05:15: Fake Gorbachev! (Played by David Lloyd Austin, who also played Gorbachev in The Naked Gun.)

1:06:45: Rocky Jr. is watching on TV with two friends and says, “That’s my dad.” His buddy’s response: “I know. What do you think we are, nerds?” I want a sequel built around that kid. By the way, I hate to criticize a little kid, but … it’s been 39 years and he’s not a kid anymore, so here goes: The kid playing Rocky Jr. can’t act a lick. The interwebs tell me he was played by Rocky Krakoff. There is a non-zero chance he got the gig solely because his name was Rocky.

1:08:25: We’re reminded Drago vs. Balboa is a non-sanctioned fight, not for the title. I betcha the Texas Commission would have sanctioned it.

1:11:05: “I must break you.” I’ll call this the third-most iconic line of the movie. The ref, by the way, is real-life referee Marty Denkin.

1:11:45: Balboa-Drago is underway, and Drago doesn’t miss a punch. All the CompuBox records are up in flames. Rocky goes down, but the ref misses it and doesn’t call a knockdown, so Drago drops him harder for an official knockdown. Adrian is crying already. Relax, lady — your husband is the title character, they aren’t going to kill him off like they did Apollo. Rocky keeps bouncing off the ropes and almost going down, foreshadowing Round 9 of Oleksandr Usyk vs. Tyson Fury.

1:14:10: Rocky: “I see three of him out there.” Paulie: “Hit the one in the middle.” This movie has just the right amount of Paulie.

1:15:10: In Round 2, Rocky gets knocked down again, gets up and runs at Drago, and there’s no knockdown called. The Rocky movies did a nice job setting the template for Million Dollar Baby in terms of scripting a film that declines to acknowledge that actual boxing has rules.

1:15:35: Rocky lands a right hand, and Drago is cut! It’s a fight! After the bell to end Round 2, as the music kicks in, Rocky lands three more punches, Drago lands a punch, and Rocky picks up the big Russian and tackles him. If he’d gone a little further and broken Drago’s neck over a stool and gotten away with it, this thing could’ve won Best Picture.

1:16:35: Drago delivers the movie’s most iconic subtitled line: “He’s not human. He is like a piece of iron.”

1:20:30: After rounds 3-14 are combined into a 3½-minute montage, the crowd in Moscow is chanting for Rocky as we head into the 15th. In Drago’s corner, the seeds of turning him sympathetic are planted when his manager proves to be the real bad guy and Drago lifts him in the air by his throat. If Drago is Darth Vader, Nicolai Koloff is Emperor Palpatine.

1:21:35: Round 15 begins. Drago is doing all the punching and can’t miss, but then Rocky turns it around, and Paulie freaks out — and it occurs to me that Joe Rogan’s annoying shocked-face schtick is totally stolen from Burt Young.

1:23:30: Rocky is banging to the body, and before long, a left hand spins Drago 360 degrees, down, and out. For the record, there is no better part of any Rocky movie than when the music kicks in as the fight ends.

1:24:55: After being wrapped in the flag and hoisted up, Rocky begins his speech, which builds to: “In here, there’s two guys killing each other. But I guess that’s better than 20 million. So what I’m trying to say is that if I can change, and you can change, everybody can change.” Gorby stands up and applauds. As do all his fellow Russian officials. The words may as well have been, “If I can change, you can tear down this wall.” Rocky has brought peace and prosperity to the world.

1:27:25: We end on a freeze frame on Rocky with the flag, and the credits begin … with Stu Nahan listed first, then Stallone and everyone else. Bizarre. I want Stu Nahan’s agent to be my agent.

Enjoy your parades, fireworks, and hot dogs, everyone. I’ll see you back here this time next year for my running diary of Stallone’s robot-free 2021 director’s cut.

Eric Raskin is a veteran boxing journalist with more than 25 years of experience covering the sport for such outlets as BoxingScene, ESPN, Grantland, Playboy, Ringside Seat, and The Ring (where he served as managing editor for seven years). He also co-hosted The HBO Boxing Podcast, Showtime Boxing with Raskin & Mulvaney, and Ring Theory and currently co-hosts . He has won three first-place writing awards from the BWAA, for his work with The Ring, Grantland, and HBO. Outside boxing, he is the senior editor of and the author of 2014’s . He can be reached on or , or via email at RaskinBoxing@yahoo.com.